Posted in #BloggiteBits Campaign

#BloggiteBits-Find T.R.U.S.T.

Find T.R.U.S.T.: Truthful words, Rely on honesty, Understand circumstances, Share openly, Try empathy

#BloggiteBits-Find Trust
Find T.R.U.S.T.

How do you know if someone is trustworthy?  Do you go by your gut instinct or by looks or by how they react to situations?  I am a believer in gut instincts for the most part, but I never let my instinct get in the way of getting to know someone.  In this installment of the ABCs of encouragement with the #BloggiteBits Campaign I am going to challenge you to Find T.R.U.S.T. in this world and others: Truthful words, Rely on honesty, Understand circumstances, Share openly, & Try empathy.

Truthful words: Words have an impact on every single person in this world.  Be it positive or negative, those words are taken to heart and do impact the way a person views themselves or their lives.  Even the toughest person can feel damaging effects from an ill spoken word.  In order to find trust and build trust, you should always be cognizant of what you are saying to someone and how it is impacting their life.  Speak truthful words to all you come in contact with, even if you are giving some kind of bad news, you can always say it in a way where it is not attacking the person you are telling.  Be truthful with your words and always strive to use positive words over negative words.

Rely on honesty: Honesty is a key element to all relationships.  As soon as dishonesty enters into a relationship, it begins to fester and form walls between the two parties.  Rely on honest feedback from yourself and others when dealing with situations.  Finding trust is hard for most people, even though they have a desire to trust, a person is more apt to shy away from someone once they find out they are being dishonest.  If you stay honest to others, they can being to rely on you and as others are honest with you, you will begin to rely on them and your relationship.

Understand circumstances: One of the greatest gifts we can give each other is understanding.  No one knows what you are going through in your life unless you share it with them.  When someone trusts you enough to share their intimate parts of their life that are not so great, finding an understanding in their circumstances will strengthen your relationship with them.  If you stop and take the time to understand the circumstances someone is going through, you will be able to adjust how you interact with them and what words you are going to say.  Everyone needs and wants understanding.

Share openly: It is hard to open up to people, at least it is for most people.  In order to find trust in relationships, you much be willing to share openly with others about your life, circumstances, and dreams.  Do not be afraid to share with someone in an open, honest way.  Even if they may not respond as you would like them to, sharing openly helps you to assess yourself and say, “I am worth getting to know and I am willing to risk the chance by being open.”  Our default is to guard our hearts and thoughts when dealing with others, but allowing someone into your life and through the guards, you will help grow your relationship to the next level of finding trust.  Share openly with others, you have a right to your opinions and feelings and taking that risk will be worth it in the end.

Try empathy: Empathy is different from sympathy.  When you feel empathy, you are truly feeling and understanding that person’s emotions or experiences.  Sympathy is just an understanding of a person’s feelings.  When dealing with others, try to empathize with them on what they are going through.  Not everyone experiences the same things, but everyone can find a similar situation that entails the same emotions.  An empathetic person has a better understanding of what people are feeling.  Finding trust is hard but when you find someone you can empathize with, it makes it easier to find trust in the relationship you have together.

~4-Ever, P

Posted in #BloggiteBits Campaign

#BloggiteBits-Embrace T.I.M.E.

Embrace T.I.M.E.: Technology is secondary, Interact face-to-face, Mute distractions, Exist in real-time

#BloggiteBits-Embrace Time
Embrace T.I.M.E.

Time.  Such a fleeting thing in our lives today.  We never have enough time to do anything, or do we?  On this installment of the ABCs of encouragement with the #BloggiteBits Campaign, I want everyone to slow down with me and Embrace T.I.M.E. on a different, old school level: Technology is secondary, Interact face-to-face, Mute distractions, & Exist in real-time.

Technology is secondary: Yes, I said it, TECHNOLOGY IS SECONDARY.  In this fun age of technology where we all want to have the latest and greatest new ‘toys’ out there to play with, we have lost sight of our human counterparts.  Embracing time with others does not include staying wired in.  When you are with another, put down the phone, tablet, computer, watch, etc. and look at the person you are with and communicate with your WORDS…LOL  I know, old school, but it is the best way to cultivate relationships you find dear to you or relationships you want to grow.

Interact face-to-face: Yes, I am requesting you SEE the world around you and look it head on.  I know, face-to-face interactions can be awkward, uncomfortable, and downright physically painful if you are not used to it, but get used to it.  Nothing beats seeing the reaction in the eyes and face of the person you are talking to when you tell them great news that you have to share!  It is amazing how simple face-to-face eye contact will change your whole demeanor throughout the day.  Old school talking…egad! Try it, you might like it.

Mute distractions: Distractions come in many forms in our daily lives, from TV to computers to other human beings, distractions are hard to avoid.  When you are spending time with someone, make sure to spend that time in a location with minimal or no distractions to either one of you.  If you cannot ignore the phone vibrating in your pocket, turn it off or put it on silence.  That is a simple distraction that causes lots of issues.  Make sure you are not distracted when engaging someone one-on-one, it will make the visit that much more enjoyable for the two of you.  Long gone are the days of quietude in the world, old school was so much nicer when it came to communicating with others.

Exist in real-time: Yes, real-time, that which is not found in a screen on some computerized device.  Existing in real-time is crucial to maintaining relationships.  So many people today feel better when delved into a game or some social media site, but it does not help real relationships with actual human beings around you.  Be sure when you are spending time with someone you are engaged with them in real-time.  Living, breathing beings are way more fun than those you play with online, even if there is another human being controlling that character you are playing with.  Old school rules, they are hardcore, Baby!

~4-Ever, P

Posted in #BloggiteBits Campaign

#BloggiteBits-Dream L.A.R.G.E.

Dream L.A.R.G.E.: Learn something new, Anchor to the goal, Remain focused, Generate your chances, Engage in opportunities

#BloggiteBits-Dream Large
Dream L.A.R.G.E.

For my next installment of the ABCs of encouragement with the #BloggiteBits Campaign I want to challenge you to Dream L.A.R.G.E. throughout life: Learn something new, Anchor to the goal, Remain focused, Generate your chances, & Engage in opportunities.

Learn something new: I am a lifelong student.  I am always in the process of learning something new each day.  The first need, when a person has a dream, is to find out everything they can about the dream they are striving for in their life.  I encourage everyone to learn one new thing a day, especially when you are reaching for a dream in life.  An active brain is a healthy, happy brain.  Challenge yourself and get those brain cells busy.  Dreaming of a specific life for yourself usually entails the need to learn or relearn habits in your daily life.  Go for it, become that inner scholar I know you are!

Anchor to the goal: Ah, the G word.  I am amazed at how many people cringe when they see the word ‘goal’ attached to something they are reading or doing.  To achieve a dream, one must focus on that dream.  To help focus on that dream, you should anchor yourself to the goal.  Be it the end goal or the little goals in between to reach the end goal, anchoring yourself to it helps keep you grounded and working toward the dream you have in life.  It will be challenging at times to keep that anchor in place and many will desire to just let it go, but don’t, Me Matee.  Latch onto that anchor and keep on grounding yourself toward that goal.  You got this, you know you do! Anchor’s away, Me Boy!

Remain focused: This is probably the hardest step when dreaming large in life.  So many distractions, demands, and deterrents cause people to lose focus on a daily basis.  When dreaming large, your focus needs to stay strong on the dream in life.  Whatever tactics you need to use to keep you focused (such as pictures, encouraging quotes, reminders, or the buddy system), put them in place immediately and be sure to refresh the focus daily.  Dreaming is a risk many people do not want to take in life because of the fear of failure.  As long as you continue to focus and strive toward your dream, you are not a failure.  Dreaming large is a risk, but remaining focused will help lessen that risk.  Ready, Set, Focus!

Generate your chances: I know, Dear Bloggites, you are wondering how to do this step.  Well, it is quite easy to do.  Engulf yourself in all things associated with your dream in life.  If you want to become a dancer, start attending classes and going to places that do the type of dancing you want to learn.  Join groups online and peruse your community activities where you live.  With the use of the internet, you have the ability to generate your chances daily.  As you engage in these activities that are associated with your dream in life, you will meet people, hear of opportunities, and before you know it, get the opportunity to do your dream.  Take a chance, worst thing that can happen is you make some new friends with the same interests, but the best things, oh those best things, THEY are what you want!

Engage in opportunities: This step goes hand-in-hand with the one above.  It does you no good if you do not embrace the chance and take the opportunity that is generated for you on the road to your dream in life.  It will be scary and risky, but it will also be exhilarating and fulfilling.  Engage in all opportunities given to you.  Remember, you have the right to dream large in life and even more importantly, you DESERVE it!

~4-Ever, P

Posted in #BloggiteBits Campaign

#BloggiteBits-Celebrate L.I.F.E.

Celebrate L.I.F.E.: Laugh daily, Invest in happiness, Focus on joy, Envision a better tomorrow

#BloggiteBits-Celebrate Life
Celebrate L.I.F.E.

Repeat after me: never start a new tradition during any holiday season! 😦

I must apologize for not posting this the day I actually posted my third installation of the ABCs of encouragement with the #BloggiteBits Campaign.  Life does get in the way, but even though it gets in the way of our planned moments, it should always be celebrated, which is what I have been doing for the holiday season. 😀

As I have been doing, Dear Bloggites, I encourage you to join me on my journey and Celebrate L.I.F.E. with these simple habits: Laugh daily, Invest in happiness, Focus on joy, & Envision a better tomorrow.

Laugh daily: This is a fairly simple concept, yet so many people forget to do it.  Laughing helps release those much needed endorphins that help a person feel good and relax.  People take life so seriously and are in such a rush they forget to realize living is a treasure to experience and laughter the compliment to that treasure.  When you are make it a point to laugh during the worst of times, you will find that those bad times are not too overwhelming to deal with.  I always choose to laugh and dance through life rather than cry and mope.  Remember, Laughter is contagious just like negativity.  Which do you think is better?

Invest in happiness: Here is a strange concept, how do you invest in happiness?  Happiness is not a tangible item that brings money in…or is it?  Happiness is a tangible item that very well may affect your income.  Think about people you know in your circle of friends who have success in their careers?  What are some similar qualities they possess?  I bet the majority of them are happy people in their personal lives.  Happiness is a trait that helps swing the vote in companies that are looking to promote employees, especially into upper management positions.  That old adage we all know, “You catch more flies with honey than you do with vinegar” resonates with this theory of happiness.  People are drawn to happy people because when you are a happy person, you become more approachable.  Investing in happiness on a daily level not only helps improve your mind, heart, & soul it extends to all other aspects of your life.

Focus on joy: There is a distinct difference between Joy and Happiness.  Happiness is a fleeting emotion, determined by circumstances whereas Joy is a constant emotion, no matter what circumstances you are facing.  Even though the two emotions go hand in hand, focusing on joy helps you see the wonderful things in your life even during the hard times.  This habit is very hard to do because it is during the hard times that you can truly see all that you have to be joyful about.  Joy in life is an inner glow that never shuts off and in many cases may be the guiding force you have to get you through a situation.  Focusing on joy is a wonderful exercise to put you in the humble state of mind called appreciation.

Envision a better tomorrow: Egad! Have I just requested a habit from you that requires having a hope in the future!  Yes, Dear Bloggites, I have!  When a person can envision a want or desire, they usually find it easier to obtain.  If you take the time at the end of your day and envision what you would like to achieve the next day, you help psych yourself to make that vision of tomorrow happen.  I encourage you to envision not only tomorrow, but a better tomorrow than your current day you are having.  By taking the time at the end of each day and envision a better tomorrow, you will be one step ahead of a positive outcome for any challenges that may be faced tomorrow.

~4-Ever, P

Posted in #BloggiteBits Campaign

#BloggiteBits-Be P.R.E.S.E.N.T.

Be P.R.E.S.E.N.T.: Pay attention, Respond openly, Express thoughts, Speak kindly, Embrace feelings, Never ignore, Treat fairly

#BloggiteBits-Be Present
Be P.R.E.S.E.N.T.

In this second installation (albeit delayed) of the ABCs of encouragement with the #BloggiteBits Campaign, I want everyone to Be P.R.E.S.E.N.T. when interacting with others: Pay attention, Respond openly, Express thoughts, Speak kindly, Embrace feelings, Never ignore, & Treat fairly.

 Pay attention: When people interact with each other in this technological age, they really do not engage or pay attention to the person they are “interacting” with.  People are so wired in to their social media that they tend to disregard the importance of being with someone.  When you are spending time with a person, pay attention to what they are saying.  Nothing on your phone is more important that validating the person you are physically with by listening and paying attention.  Remember, Attention to one another always helps validate our lives.

Respond openly: One of the best relationships to cultivate is one of pure, loving honesty.  When you are engaging someone, always respond to them in an open manner to let them know that you care and want to hear what they have going on in their life.  The way the world is today, it is usually safest to keep yourself guarded, but when dealing with personal relationships, that guard must be put down and you must respond in an open manner if you want the relationship to truly flourish and change each other.  An open demeanor is always inviting and appreciated.

Express thoughts:  Social media has been the downfall of expressing thoughts in a tactful way.  It is easy to express negative, hateful thoughts to the world without a face.  This is not good if you want to grow strong, honest relationships with friends, family, or anyone.  When you are engaged one on one with someone, express thoughts about the subject being discussed.  As nice as it is to have someone just listen, it is that much nicer when that person becomes part of the discussion by expressing what they think.  By expressing thoughts on the topic at hand, you are letting that person know that you are hearing what they are saying and are truly listening to the conversation.  Thoughts are better shared in a tactful, loving way.

Speak kindly: As I touched a little on the negative effects of social media when interacting with others, I will reiterate the need to always speak kindly to others.  You do not know what that person you are interacting with online or in person is truly going through, and a kind word spoken gently to them will have such a positive impact on their life, one that you may never realize.  Just as it takes one negative word to take a life, it also takes just one kind word to save one.  Kind words cause a positive ripple effect in the social world and will always be paid forward to others.

Embrace feelings: I am one of those people that instinctively react in a logical, cool demeanor, however, I try to always embrace my feelings I am going through at the time.  Embracing feelings allows a person to fully understand where they are at in their life.  If you embrace your feelings while interacting with others, your ability to engage all understanding will be heightened.  When you are talking with someone and you are overwhelmed with an emotion, embrace it and share it with the person you are talking to.  Expressing the feelings will help that person understand where you are in your life and at that moment in time while talking to them.  Feelings are meant to be expressed, shared, and embraced to fully live your life.

Never ignore: No one likes to be ignored.  I have yet to meet someone that says they like being ignored over having attention given to them.  When you are spending time with someone, do not ignore them or dismiss them for social media stuff.  Being present in life means engaging it and people.  Never ignore your present interaction for something unimportant.  Life is meant to be lived.  Ignoring a person will never help that relationship grow into something strong and life-changing.

Treat fairly: When you are dealing with someone, treat them fairly.  No one wants to be mistreated or feel taken advantage of.  Treat people fairly in life.  There is too much hate and unfair treatment in this world.  People are so self-involved in this “me” society that they do not think they are expected to be fair.  Be the exception.  Fair treatment of others always impacts their lives.

~4-Ever, P

Posted in #BloggiteBits Campaign

#BloggiteBits-Achieve P.E.A.C.E.

Achieve P.E.A.C.E.: Patience with others, Extend a helping hand, Always smile, Choose your words wisely, Enjoy each moment.

#BloggiteBits-Achieving Peace
Achieve P.E.A.C.E.

For my Bloggite Bits Campaign, I will be doing the ABCs of encouragement.  Today’s #BloggiteBits is a little ditty about how people can Achieve P.E.A.C.E. in their lives by doing these five little acts: Patience with others, Extend a helping hand, Always smile, Choose your words wisely, & Enjoy each moment.

Patience with others:  We all have had trouble finding patience at some point in our life.  Be it work, family, friends, or even the guy in the car in front of you driving too slow for your liking.  Patience is something everyone wishes they had more of.  When you are interacting with others and you begin to feel your patience waning, try and place yourself in that person’s shoes and view the conversation from their eyes.  It is a hard task to do, but the more you try, the easier it becomes.  Finding patience within oneself for others allows you to flourish within your own life.

Extend a helping hand: So many people in this day and age do not have time to do anything for others except what is required of them.  I do not believe it is a lack of understanding (there are some exceptions) but more of a time constraint with all the demands in their life.  When you see someone struggling, whether it is financially, personally, or work wise, take that opportunity to extend that helping hand before they ask for it.  If more people reach out before being asked to do something, I believe the overall attitude will show more gratitude for being in the position to help someone in need.  Helping others always gives a sense of purpose in life that is outside of oneself.

Always smile: This is a simple one.  Anytime a person smiles it releases several chemical reactions in their brain that immediately helps reduce stress, relaxes the body, and has an overall positive effect on one’s mood.  Aside from what it does for the person doing the smiling, it also causes others to stop and smile back thus releasing the same feel-good chemicals in the other person.  Smiling is a win-win for all.  Even in difficult or sad times, a person can always find something to smile about even if it is just the simple fact that the difficult or sad situation is almost at an end.  I always say I would rather go through life smiling and dancing than being sad and down on life.

Choose your words wisely: I think this is one of the hardest things for people to do.  Most people instinctively react to unknown situations brought on by another in a defensive, negative way in order to preserve their personal bubble of safety.  By not reacting out of instinct and taking a moment to assess the situation, a person can formulate a proper, non-aggressive response to the other person involved.  When you come into contact with another person, try and think of ways to encourage and uplift that person in a positive way before moving on in your daily activities.  You will be surprised at how much better you will feel plus how better each person you come into contact with will act toward you in the future.  Positivity persuades while negativity delays.

Enjoy each moment: I bet you were expecting the last E in P.E.A.C.E to say, “Enjoy Every Moment” instead…LOL  I chose the word ‘each’ over ‘every’ for one simple reason.  Each, to me, designates one incident, whereas ‘every’ designates a group of incidents.  I know they are synonyms, however, I like the feel of ‘each’ in this final achievement of peace. 🙂  Enjoying each moment will allow you to fully immerse yourself in the situation you are experiencing.  Be it good or bad, each moment will impact your life in some way.  By finding the joy and enjoying the moment, you will be a changed person in the end.  The change may be noticeable immediately or it may not show up until a later date, but rest assured, each moment you live of your life has an impact on your future moments as well as your future reactions to the next ‘big’ event.  Life is about the little things, we can all embrace a large event, but embracing the little ones makes your life more fulfilling and enjoyable.

~4-Ever, P

Posted in #BloggiteBits Campaign

#BloggiteBits

Good Day, Dear Bloggites. 🙂  I know my last post was a rather melancholy one about my Dah (Dad), so I decided to share a bit about how I get through when life is throwing nasty screwballs my way.

I combat those screwballs by focusing on everything I have that is positive in my life.  Today, while I was musing over the way I cope, I thought, wouldn’t it be awesome to take that coping mechanism and spread out into the world?

I have always been a Brighter-Side kinda gal most of my life.  I believe in the greater good of a person’s heart versus the darker death-toll of their heart.  However, even though I look for the good in others, I am all too familiar with the darker side of them as well and see the potential danger in each person I meet on my Life Journey.

With all the negative energy and negative activity going on in the world, I am going to do my part in trying to balance it out with some #BloggiteBits daily.  Each day, I am going to try and remember to post something on my personal accounts with Facebook, Twitter, WordPress, etc. that will be an encouragement, a funny thought, or musing that will put positive spins out there in the netherworld.

If anyone wants to join me on my quest to beat the negativity, just post your musings or thoughts and end with the all familiar hashtag of #BloggiteBits.  Let’s go make a difference in the world, everyone! 🙂

~4-Ever, P