Posted in #BloggiteBits Campaign

#BloggiteBits-Imagine M.O.R.E.

Imagine M.O.R.E.: Meaningful encounters, Optimal communication, Reaction impaction, Extraordinary relationships

#BloggiteBits-Imagine More
Imagine M.O.R.E.

We all desire to be the person that can walk into a room and carry on a conversation with whomever you walk by.  Not just the standard fluff of weather talk, but an actual conversation that helps each person feel connect for a short time with the person they are talking with.  I believe everyone is capable of doing this with some simple things to keep in mind.  In this installment of the ABCs of encouragement with the #BloggiteBits Campaign, I want you to Imagine M.O.R.E. for yourself when it comes to conversations and the gift of gab:  Meaningful encounters, Optimal communication, Reaction impaction, & Extraordinary relationships.

Meaningful encounters: When you engage in meaningful encounters with others, you find more satisfaction from just a regular passing conversation and it will help you imagine more levels of communication than just the one you are used to.  Engaging others with conversations that are about a topic or topics near and dear to you or those takes that conversation to a higher plane on the communication grid.  When you come into contact with someone, ask a few simple questions to get an understanding of where the person is at and what they hold dear to them.  If they tell you a topic you know, GREAT; begin to engage in a great give and take conversation.  If they tell you about a topic you are unfamiliar with, GREAT; ask them questions.  Allow them to share their passion for that topic.  This will open them up to you and make them feel validated as a person with thoughts and you will feel more open just by seeing how their inner fire is ignited on a topic they are passionate about.

Optimal communication: Did you know that communication has different levels: boring, tolerable, okay, good, and optimal.  Yes, I made these levels up, but they help me imagine more on the communication grid.  These levels are real to me and all levels are obtainable when I am communicating with others.  Optimal communication is when the passion is ignited within you and the person you are talking with about a topic or topics.  Think about when you are talking to someone.  How would you rate the last conversation you had with someone?  Was it a conversation you were fully engaged in or was it so boring that you really do not even remember what you talked about?  When you find a common ground with someone on a topic or topics, you will become more interested in what the person is saying to you and when the topic is something you are passionate about, you become fully engaged in the conversation.  This is how optimal communication is achieved.  Find common ground topics to discuss each time you have an opportunity to carry on a conversation, it will bring your conversation to a higher plane.

Reaction impaction: I love this simple phrase: reaction impaction.  In order to imagine more on your communication grid, you need to become aware of the reaction impaction you and the person you are talking to have during the conversation.  A reaction impaction is what happens when you do not guard your facial expressions as well as your instinctive words of defense if you are in an uncomfortable conversation.  To bring your communication to a higher plane with others, start to become aware of how you are feeling and what you are thinking when listening to someone.  Your thoughts and feelings do show on your face even if you do not realize it and if the reaction impaction is positive then the person will become more engaged in the conversation with you, however, if the reaction impaction is neutral or negative, the person will become uncomfortable with the conversation and will quickly look to end it or find a different topic to discuss.  Negative reaction impactions leave bad tastes in a person’s mouth as well as may affect their outlook for the rest of the day.  Positive reaction impaction leaves a happy feeling and will also affect a person’s outlook for the rest of the day, but in a good way.

Extraordinary relationships: We all would love to experience an extraordinary relationship at least once in our life.  Having an extraordinary relationship with others is dependent upon you imagining more when you encounter them.  Extraordinary relationships take work and practice to obtain in your life.  If you are aware of how you are communicating with others and make it a point to leave the people feeling excited and fulfilled after a conversation with you, you will begin to cultivate extraordinary relationships one person at a time.  Cultivating relationships by always striving to take your communication to a higher plane will help you feel as if you are impacting the people you come into contact with on a daily basis.  Not only will you help others feel better and help improve their daily outlook, you will also see, by cultivating extraordinary relationships, that your daily outlook is also experiencing positive results.

~4-Ever, P

Posted in #BloggiteBits Campaign

#BloggiteBits-Be P.R.E.S.E.N.T.

Be P.R.E.S.E.N.T.: Pay attention, Respond openly, Express thoughts, Speak kindly, Embrace feelings, Never ignore, Treat fairly

#BloggiteBits-Be Present
Be P.R.E.S.E.N.T.

In this second installation (albeit delayed) of the ABCs of encouragement with the #BloggiteBits Campaign, I want everyone to Be P.R.E.S.E.N.T. when interacting with others: Pay attention, Respond openly, Express thoughts, Speak kindly, Embrace feelings, Never ignore, & Treat fairly.

 Pay attention: When people interact with each other in this technological age, they really do not engage or pay attention to the person they are “interacting” with.  People are so wired in to their social media that they tend to disregard the importance of being with someone.  When you are spending time with a person, pay attention to what they are saying.  Nothing on your phone is more important that validating the person you are physically with by listening and paying attention.  Remember, Attention to one another always helps validate our lives.

Respond openly: One of the best relationships to cultivate is one of pure, loving honesty.  When you are engaging someone, always respond to them in an open manner to let them know that you care and want to hear what they have going on in their life.  The way the world is today, it is usually safest to keep yourself guarded, but when dealing with personal relationships, that guard must be put down and you must respond in an open manner if you want the relationship to truly flourish and change each other.  An open demeanor is always inviting and appreciated.

Express thoughts:  Social media has been the downfall of expressing thoughts in a tactful way.  It is easy to express negative, hateful thoughts to the world without a face.  This is not good if you want to grow strong, honest relationships with friends, family, or anyone.  When you are engaged one on one with someone, express thoughts about the subject being discussed.  As nice as it is to have someone just listen, it is that much nicer when that person becomes part of the discussion by expressing what they think.  By expressing thoughts on the topic at hand, you are letting that person know that you are hearing what they are saying and are truly listening to the conversation.  Thoughts are better shared in a tactful, loving way.

Speak kindly: As I touched a little on the negative effects of social media when interacting with others, I will reiterate the need to always speak kindly to others.  You do not know what that person you are interacting with online or in person is truly going through, and a kind word spoken gently to them will have such a positive impact on their life, one that you may never realize.  Just as it takes one negative word to take a life, it also takes just one kind word to save one.  Kind words cause a positive ripple effect in the social world and will always be paid forward to others.

Embrace feelings: I am one of those people that instinctively react in a logical, cool demeanor, however, I try to always embrace my feelings I am going through at the time.  Embracing feelings allows a person to fully understand where they are at in their life.  If you embrace your feelings while interacting with others, your ability to engage all understanding will be heightened.  When you are talking with someone and you are overwhelmed with an emotion, embrace it and share it with the person you are talking to.  Expressing the feelings will help that person understand where you are in your life and at that moment in time while talking to them.  Feelings are meant to be expressed, shared, and embraced to fully live your life.

Never ignore: No one likes to be ignored.  I have yet to meet someone that says they like being ignored over having attention given to them.  When you are spending time with someone, do not ignore them or dismiss them for social media stuff.  Being present in life means engaging it and people.  Never ignore your present interaction for something unimportant.  Life is meant to be lived.  Ignoring a person will never help that relationship grow into something strong and life-changing.

Treat fairly: When you are dealing with someone, treat them fairly.  No one wants to be mistreated or feel taken advantage of.  Treat people fairly in life.  There is too much hate and unfair treatment in this world.  People are so self-involved in this “me” society that they do not think they are expected to be fair.  Be the exception.  Fair treatment of others always impacts their lives.

~4-Ever, P