Posted in Writer Musings

365 Opportunities

A few days ago, I noticed a comic posting on my Aunt’s Facebook page.  It made me pause and think.  I have started my blog posts each year with words or plans on how I want my year to be.  Each year, I have met some goals but also have failed in many others.  Especially in my writing life.

When I saw this post, it spoke to me on a very deep level.  I know, Dear Bloggites, you are thinking “comics affecting you on a deep level…uh huh…” but that is what it did!  This simple two frame comic gave me my word and my focus and my hope!

365 Opportunities
Be Happy Facebook Page-Creator Unknown

I am all about building others up and viewing life, no, not life, viewing A DAY as an opportunity to build someone up, no matter how small; I realized I would not only enrich my life but the life of others around me, even for just a moment when helping others build their life up.  But having that positive outlook for others when it comes to encouragement of actions in life, I realize I do not share that mindset for myself in my writing life.

No matter what I do, I seem to allow my writing goals fall to the wayside.  I hear people say all the time that if you really want something, it will be important, and you will make a point to get/do it as much as you can.  I agree with this, but I also disagree with this statement.  I love to write and can fall into the world I am creating and exist there for many hours when I am writing, but I realize that it is the sitting down and starting that is holding me back.

I freeze up just at the thought of writing something.  All the negative mental talk starts screaming in my head and it screams so loud that it drowns out the thought of writing and forces me to do something else.  I hate this!  I have self-love with my abilities and actions, but when it comes to writing, that self-love is so stifled that I question why I even bother to try to write anything.

That is the crux of writing for me.  I KNOW no one has my voice on subjects and I KNOW that whatever I write is mine and mine alone to share with the world as I see fit; however, the KNOWING is not enough to combat the negativity of “Who do YOU think you are to even believe YOU have anything to say to ANYONE that will IMPACT their life.  GET OVER YOURSELF!”

This negative self-talk is what creates the freeze factor for me at the thought of writing anything.  I am working on this and the comic strip above is going to be my help.  I am going to take it one day at a time and just make sure I write something even for just five minutes and then at the end of 2019, I can honestly say, “I DO have something to say to ANYONE willing to listen and I KNOW it will IMPACT their life, if only for the simple fact that it is something a person can relate to within their life when reading my words.

My word for this year is Opportunity.  I am going to take the 365 Opportunities to enrich as many people as I can, one day at a time AND enrich myself as much as I can with my words being penned to paper.  Happy New Year! Smooches!

~4-Ever, P

Posted in This & That

Did You Miss Me?

May 9, 2018.  That was the last time I posted here Dear Bloggites.  Seven long months of silence.  I am sorry for that.  I was dealing with stuff and things called Life and Life Choices.  It sounds better “stuff and things” because “life and life choices” sounds so beat down and serious!

Let me give you a rundown of what my seven months looked like in a quick eggshell – staring off into the distance 

June 2018 – Business was struggling and I had to make a choice to find a job working for “The Man” again.  Let me tell you it was a rough decision to make because I have had my own business since 2012 and basically did whatever I wanted, whenever I wanted and had to answer to no one.

July 2018 – “The Man” found me and offered me a job working from home (good), decent pay (also good), and mega bonuses (great!).  I was basically doing the same stuff I did when I worked at Mid-Ohio Field Services as a Reginal Manage but in this job I was just an Account Manager and worked the new client for Radius Property Services.  This client was growing like weeds and the company found a need for someone to just manage that account, enter Peggy (Me).

August 2018 – Still worked for “The Man” but I found myself very miserable.  I loved the work, the contractors, and the client, but the people I answered to for my job were in a tug of war over handling me.  The one boss/owner who hired me loved me to death and I could do no wrong.  This was great except his brought-on partner felt threatened.  So anytime she heard praise from him about me, she went out of her way to try and make me look bad, thus causing him to question my ability to do the job.

September 2018 – Still the pawn in the sick tug of war between owners.  I was able to add my sister, 4 of 7 (need clarity on this name read A Daughter’s Journey with Her Dad: The Twist), as a part-time processor because we were so busy with the client I managed.  The micro-managing started with the owners and the work I was doing.  Yeah, if you know me, I do not do micro-managing – I don’t do it and I don’t tolerate it being done to me.

October 2018 – The fast-growing company I managed announced that they were closing their doors.  Not uncommon in the industry of Property Preservation (which is why I hate the industry), so this left my boss at a quandary.  You know how I was able to hire 4 of 7? Yeah, had to let her go and I told her that unless the company I worked for was picked up as a contractor by the new company that bought out my current account, my time was limited as well.

November 2018 – My statement to 4 of 7 came true and I was laid off in the middle of October by “The Man”.  There was not enough work within the company to blend me in plus they were paying a good chunk of money for me AND the threatened boss took the opportunity to get rid of me.  It was all for the good, I was miserable and hated the job.  While I needed to go look for another job, I had money squirreled away to give me a cushion and take my time to find a job.  This decision to take it easy was apparently my body’s queue to make me sick – ALL MONTH LONG!

December 2018 – Hidey-Ho, we are now back to the future – returning from staring off into the distance – I am no longer sick, Thank GOD!  I started a new part-time job yesterday, December 13, 2018.  I will be working as a caregiver for home bound clients trying to stay in their homes during their twilight years.

As many of you know, there are three things near and dear to my heart: the homeless, the elderly, and the ability to build up others on a daily basis.  So, this job will allow me to care for the elderly while still having time to work on my writing, blogging (EGADS – I SAID IT! or wrote it…) and building out my YouTube Channel into something that will allow me to work on the other two things: the homeless and building up others on a daily basis.

Well, that is it for now.  I have another blog post coming out about one of my favorite group of Monkeys in my Tribal Circus right after this one.  Hope you are ready to hear from me more regularly, heck, I hope I am finally ready to communicate more regularly. 🙂 Smooches!!!

~4-Ever, P

Posted in Encouragement, Writer Musings

Forgiveness vs Reconciliation

A couple of weeks ago I was driving in my car and the program I was listening to was discussing forgiveness and reconciliation.  Listening to this program made me really begin to analyze the difference between the two and the impact each has on a person’s life.

According to dictionary.com, the definition of forgiveness means: 1. act of forgiving or being forgiven and 2. disposition or willingness to forgive.  The definition of reconciliation, according to dictionary.com, means: 1. act of reconciling, as when former enemies agree to an amicable truce, 2. the state of being reconciled, as when someone becomes resigned to something not desired, and 3. the process of making consistent or compatible.

Reconciliation requires two or more people to find a common ground when a situation occurs that causes issues between them.  A person may say that they have “reconciled” themselves to something that happened to them, but the reality is, unless that person has found the restoration or harmony with another, they have not truly been able to finalize the whole situation to put it to rest in their life.  Two or more people must want the reconciliation of a situation for that situation to find a resolution.

Forgiveness, which can occur between two or more people, is really a singular act for each person.  A person who refuses to find forgiveness for someone or something that has caused them pain or wrongdoing, allows the other party to live rent free in their head.  I say this because, when you refuse to let go of the pain, hurt, and damage done against you, you force yourself to live in that moment every day of your life and allow it to control you and all your decisions you make.

“I’m sorry” is a hard statement to make and many times even harder to accept.  Hearing this statement does not take the pain, wrongdoing, and damage away.  Even if you cannot reconcile yourself with the person that caused the hurt, you can choose to forgive that person.  It is only with the forgiving that you can truly begin to heal.

The state of forgiveness is where you find the freedom to move past the pain, wrongdoing, and damage that is causing you to suffer.  Forgiveness takes away the “live here rent free” sign in your head.  Learning to forgive any pain, damage, or wrongdoing done against you will allow your body and mind to begin to heal.

You may never forget the pain, damage, or wrongdoing done against you and you may never be able to reconcile the situation with the person that caused the harm, but when you allow yourself to forgive, that pain will become less; that damage will begin to mend; and that wrongdoing will begin to fade as each day goes by.  You will begin to feel the sensation of the freedom you are allowing yourself when you choose to forgive.  After all, you deserve to be free mind, body, and soul. 🙂

Do you struggle with one or both of these things in your life, Dear Bloggite?  How have you handled situations or people in the past who caused you to hurt?  Share your thoughts and experiences, and together, we will work through it.

~4-Ever, P

Posted in Writer Musings

Slow And Steady…

Hello, Dear Bloggites. 🙂  I am happy to let you know that change is happening, slowly and surely, the change is going to happen.  This change is leading toward reaching some more goals that I set back in 2017 and renewed in 2018.

Change 3 Update: My current business is surviving this lull in the industry and seems to finally have bounced back…continue to find ways to build income from this business – I am glad and sad to say my coworker has found another job due to the reduction in work orders.  I am glad for him and his new journey, but sad, because he has helped me build my business and we have worked together for the past few years.  I know he will have great success in his new journey. 🙂

Change 3 Update: I will find myself on my own again with my son, the dog, and the guinea pig with no roommate for the first time in, geez, years – Because of the new job status for my coworker, it puts me one step closer to being on my own again.  With the drive he has to make each day, and with the steady increase in income, it will allow him to find his own place in a few months. 🙂

As you can see, I just wanted to check in with y’all and let you know what is going on.  It has been a couple of days since I blogged last, but this one puts me back on schedule.  I am excited about the new changes taking place and I hope you will continue with me on this awesome journey! 🙂

What exciting changes are happening in your life?  Share in the comments below.  Look forward to chatting with you. 🙂

~4-Ever, P

Posted in Writer Musings

I Love It When A Plan Comes Together

Admit it, before you watched the video you heard Hannibal saying the title of this blog post, I know you did! 🙂  Today’s post is about what the title says: plans falling into place and coming together.

I spent all day in the wonderful presence of many writers and people on fire for Christ, Dear Bloggites.  I was invited to join Roaring Lambs organization’s testimonial workshop and then stay for Roaring Writers executive committee luncheon.  I met, Debbie Snell, at a Christian Networking Breakfast that I went to with my best friend and owner of InSpeyer HR, Tracy.

After chatting a bit with Debbie, she told me she thought we could totally work together in one way or the other after she found out about my PAC Wordsmith business and author site.  The next day after the luncheon, Debbie called me and invited me to join them today to see what we can do.

It was an Amazing time I spent with Debbie and several others, some whom I already knew, and many whom I just met today (or the day I met Debbie).  I partnered with them to help grow the Roaring Writers group to help Christian writers get their books out to the world.  I love words (as you all know) and I love Christ, so you can just imagine how stoked I am about this new opportunity! 🙂

This is just another step to the road of writing full time and engulfing myself in all things written.  I am still working my processing business, Legacy Preservation, and will continue with my current clients, but with the drying up of the property preservation industry, I am finding that I need to find additional revenue to make up for the loss of money.  Having that additional revenue come from one of my two passions, writing, just makes it that much better.

As I move forward with Roaring Writers, I will keep all of you updated.  It is just Unbelievable when a plan does come together!  Smooches!

~4-Ever, P

Posted in Encouragement, Writer Musings

Your Outlook On Life

Have you ever listened to your internal thoughts?  You know the ones, Dear Bloggites, the little voice in your head constantly telling you this and that on everything you do in life.

I love to learn; and when I learn some interesting facts or a new thought process, I take notice.  I am that person that hopes for the best and plans for the worst.  Having that type of outlook on life, for me, allows me to enjoy the little things in life while being prepared for the unexpected.

That little voice or internal thought is my joy and pain.  My joy because I know I can do anything I set my mind to do and usually when I make up my mind to do something, I rarely change it.  But on the flip side of that, the inner thoughts are my pain.  I am constantly catching myself doing negative speak in my head.  You know the kind – “You’re an idiot”, “Stupid”, “Ugly”, etc.  I hear them all the time trying to take forefront in my brain and it is a constant battle for me.

If you have ever spent five minutes with me, you will probably be surprised by this admission, but it is true.  The negativity bleeds in my brain about myself a lot and I am constantly having to patch up the wound.  That is why most people would be shocked to know that I even have one negative thought in my brain because I CHOOSE to embrace this Journey called Life and so whenever I hear the negative monster stomping up the isle in my mind, I slam the door shut and repeat positive thoughts that void the negative.

Doing this trick – changing the negative to the positive – is hard because you must make a conscious effort to really listen to your mind and thoughts all the time.  Some days are harder than other days, but I keep the fight going because at the end of the day, I want to look at myself in the mirror and know I did right by everyone I was in contact with as well as doing right by myself.

What do you struggle with and how do you deal with it?  Share your thoughts below.  I look forward to chatting with you.

~4-Ever, P

Posted in Writer Musings

Easter Musings

Happy Easter, Ya’ll! 🙂  Today was a rare day and a glorious one.

I will start on the rare day first:

Today was a rare day because work was actually closed all day!  Last time we closed was on Christmas Day, so I decided we were off on Easter Sunday.  It was really nice to not have to get up and load the computer and start processing orders.  I was able to turn off my regular alarm, lazily wake up, and then have cuddle time with my dog, Ragonk.  I went to Bible Study class, then spent the afternoon with family.  It was wonderful!  I truly believe the mind and body need rest and with the industry that my business is in, it prevents that ability due to being a seven-day a week industry.  I feel the pressure of working seven days.  I am trying to create boundaries to allow my mind and body to get the needed rest and today was a first step on that journey. 🙂

What do you do to get the rest for your mind and body, Dear Bloggite?  Share your thoughts in the comments below.

Now, onto the glorious one:

Being a Christian, today I celebrated the Risen Christ after His crucifixion and three-days in the tomb.  Today reminds believers that Christ is alive and well and He has overcome death.  I have many friends who are Christians and many who are not, and one of the biggest differences I see in these two types of friends is the fear of death.  When you are not a believer in Christ, you view death as an ending with nothingness after.  When you are a believer in Christ, death is just the beginning of a life everlasting with Christ.  As a believer, I do not fear death, I welcome it when it is my time to go because I know I will go to a better place than this Earth.  That knowledge is so refreshing and having that knowledge, I rejoice in the life people lived after they pass and rejoice in their life everlasting if they are a believer.  It is amazing to be free of the fear of death and I wish everyone could feel that. 😀

What do you believe in, Dear Bloggites?  Do you celebrate life and death, or do you live with the fear of death each day of your life?  Share your belief in the comments below.

~4-Ever, P

Posted in Writer Musings

It Can Be Done! :) Angela Did It!

Great Things Quote Vincent Van GoghI know it can be done.  I have heard it many, many times before.  I have read it, discussed it, and ponder it until the cows came home; but today, I witnessed it!  You wonder what “It” is, do you, Dear Bloggites?  Well, let me explain “It” to you.

It is not sex, but something better, yeah, I said it, something better!  It is watching someone work so hard and so long, trudging through the quagmire of memory and pain, to come out on the other side, wholer (is that a word?  Well, I am using it!) than they were before and having the proof of that journey.

I was blessed to join a wonderful group of ladies at the Heart & Soul Writer’s Group tonight and I was greeted with the wonderful smiles of Pat and Lisa asking me how I have been doing and what they can do to help me on my journey of writing and after a while, Angela joined us.  She looked transformed from the last time I saw her, and in her arms, she carried the first edition of her story!  YaY!!!!!

I have watched and listened and discussed with her over the past year on the few (sadly, very few) visits I have managed to make to this group meeting about her story.  It is a story I can closely relate to because of my story.  Now, I know I am getting oddly cryptic, but I don’t want to give away her story until she has determined how she wants to present it.

I have heard that writing a book and FINISHING a book can be done, but until tonight, I never witnessed it actually happening to someone I knew.  My heart is overrun with joy for Angela and I am so inspired that I have yet another fire in my soul to get my book finished to share with the world.

Thank You, Angela, for sharing your journey with me, and I cannot wait to buy your book! Congrats!!!!

~4-Ever, P

Posted in Writer Musings

Self-Help Books For Writers

Hello, Dear Bloggites!  I am pleased to say the Women in Publishing Summit ended with a bang! 🙂  I have many new things and thoughts to take in and formulate understanding in my brain from what I thought I knew and what is the reality when it comes to writing books.

I was taught the different lengths of written work determines the “name” assigned to them: i.e. short story, poem, novella, novel, epic novel, chap books, etc.  However, during this Summit, I have learned that there are such a wide variety of book types between the genres and sub-genres.  Did you know that there is a sub-genre for “Books you can read in 45-minutes or less”?  BLEW MY MIND!!!!

While I continue to take in this new information I learned, there were several books the guest authors shared or wrote for writers and entrepreneurs alike.  Really, any person who owns their own business, no matter what it is, can dub themselves entrepreneurs.  So many people stick with “Small Business Owner” but really, you have an entrepreneur’s heart for business.  No matter what you call yourself, as long as you stay true to yourself and your beliefs, you are golden. 🙂

Okay, back to the authors and their books.  While, I want to purchase many more, there were three that I immediately had to have.  Below are the three books and what they are about, as well as, a brief reason why I wanted that specific book:

  1. The Four Types of Dogs Every Business Needs by Bella Vasta

The Four Types of Dogs Every Business Needs by Bella VastaDescription: Building a business was never meant to be done alone.  There are certain key players that every business needs in order to grow their business and have a balanced life.  Without the right team, business owners risk suffocating in their own efforts and ultimately throwing their entire life out of balance.  While using the metaphor of some of the most popular breeds, learn what dogs every business must have on their team so they can all play together having an enjoyable time in the dog eat dog world of business.

The reason I bought this book is two-fold: I love dogs (especially terriers, as you know, because I own one) and being a small business owner, I am constantly burning the candle at both ends and always wonder how these other business owners find the people to allow them the freedom of enjoying their hard work.  I have read this book, but for continuity, I will wait to give any reviews until I have read all three. 🙂

2.  The Artful Edit by Susan Bell

The Artful Edit by Susan BellDescription: The Artful Edit explores the many-faceted and often misunderstood-or simply overlooked-art of editing.  Brimming with examples, strategic tips, exercises, and a series of remarkable interviews with such writers as Michael Ondaatje and Ann Patchett, Susan Bell’s vigorous investigation into the history and meaning of the edit reminds us that editing is much more than a computer spell-check-it is an art.  Like The Elements of Style, The Artful Edit is a must-have companion for every writer.

The reason I bought this book is obvious: I need to learn to edit my written works smartly so that when it is sent to an editor or published, it will not have any errors (hopefully).  I own The Elements of Style and am very excited to read what this book has to say.

3. Mindset Switch! by Tonya Rineer

Mindset Switch of Tonya RineerDescription: Mindset Switch is the solution for anyone who wants more than average success, yet finds themselves stuck in a loop of negative self-talk, limiting beliefs, and self-doubt.  This book does what no other book on mindset does.  It highlights the holistic interplay between how thoughts and feelings become ingrained in us as disempowering beliefs, and how that cycle repeats itself, sabotaging us over and over again.  Citing existing mindset research, along with the Laws of Attraction and Vibration and introducing her own tried and true system for identifying triggers, Tonya’s book is for those who are new to mindset and personal development work as well as those who are already familiar with the basic concepts and are looking to advance their practice.

This book will help you ditch your limiting beliefs so you can, take control of what you want and create a life that, before now, you could barely imagine was possible.

The reason I bought this book is because, like most people, I live with constant self-doubt when it comes to things I am passionate about, such as writing.  We all live with that negative voice in our heads that sub-consciously set us up for failure before we even begin.  This book covers the triggers and gives advice on how to beat them before they do any damage plus change your negative mindset into a positive one.

Well, that is it for now.  I will be back with a review on all three books once I have read them all.  Also, look for first book review of the year in a little bit.  It is still a passion of mine to help all writers by providing reviews, so that is something I will always do on this blog.  Smooches!!!

~4-Ever, P

Posted in Writer Musings

Remember When…

Let’s turn back time to 2017.  Remember when I posted New Year, New Start 2017 on January 1, 2017?  Don’t remember, Dear Bloggites, click the link, take a moment to read the post, I can wait right here for you.  Let me know when you are back.

Okay, now that you are back, I had grand plans with those three key words: Change, Passion, and Luck.  Today, I was flipping through my notebook of the different scribbles I make, some on new written works, some on classes, some on random thoughts to do something with, on this flipping excursion, I came across this:

Goals 2017

Now, if you look real close, you will see the graph I made on adding one new thing each month.  January just had ‘Skin Regiment’ which I started (thus the check over it); February added ‘Get Dressed’, odd goal but those of you who work from home will understand the ease it is to just stay in the PJs all day; March added ‘Workout’ to the other two items.  Now, as you already have noticed, I did not check off ‘Get Dressed’ or ‘Workout’ and the ensuing months, I added nothing, nada, the big fat 0!

All those goals and plans withered away and died as life began demanding all my time.  Also, the items and sub-items for Change, Passion, and Luck, did not happen.  A synopsis of the goals and if it happened or not:

Change 1: I will find myself on my own again with my son, the dog, and the guinea pig with no roommate for the first time in, geez, years – Did not happen and we lost my son’s guinea pig earlier this year.  Still hoping the roommate moves out but until he can find sustainable money coming in, I don’t see it happening too soon. 😦

Change 2: I have been paying for a gym membership for the past year and have not utilized it…going to utilize this gym membership to change my health for the better and reach the weight I am happiest at once again – Did not happen, however, I did let that gym membership close and now I paid for an entire year at another gym closer to my house, maybe this year…

Change 3: My current business is surviving this lull in the industry and seems to finally have bounced back…continue to find ways to build income from this business – My current business is still struggling and my co-worker is looking for another job because there is not enough work for two people to do (if you have not figured it out, my roommate is my co-worker).

Change 4: I am going to take advantage of the social invites I get and start actually going – Didn’t happen, I am getting better, but not where I wanted to be.

Passion 1: I have a wordsmith business…I plan on growing this business up, one client at a time and look forward to the new relationships I shall make along the way – While I have had some clients, it is nowhere near where I wanted to be at this time now.

Passion 2: I am now looking at taking myself seriously as a writer and growing this part of me on a personal level…My goal is to sign up for some form of writing class each month to build my talent as a writer and start opening doors to the publishing world to promote myself as a writer – I did good with the classes for the first three months, as well as, writing, but then life scattered the classes and writing to the wind.

Luck 1: I know with every situation I face, I will need a little luck in finding my way – Luck is still my friend but decided to work in the background and not allowing all the doors and opportunities to be opened.

Luck 2: Waking up every morning…just start finding things to fill my time outside work – Did not happen.  Waking up did, but nothing outside work.

As, you can all see, my goals and plans were dust in the wind rather quickly.  Now that a new year is here and pretty much at the same point when last year’s goals petered out, I am ramping up my determination and going to push through everything to obtain these goals this year.

I hope you travel on this journey with me, Dear Bloggites, because it is lonely sometimes and encouragement and especially accountability go a long way.  If you do not see me posting for a while, shoot me a comment here and give me the proverbial “Kick in the Ass” to get me going again.

~4-Ever, P